As 2012 trudges off into the distance, umbrella in hand, and 2013 arrives amid a flurry of new year’s resolutions which should take us through to the end of the month, what can we look forward to in Twickenham in 2013? Here are just 10 things that might (or might not) happen:
- Work starts on the station development. TRAG activists go underground, hiding out in barns by day and blowing up the railway tracks at night. A Solum Regeneration troop train is derailed and South West Trains also get disrupted. No one notices the difference.
- Three restaurants and four cafes close. The following month, three new restaurants and four new cafes open… in exactly the same premises. And so on.
- The new school opens on the Clifden Road site. Clifden Road residents erect barricades in an attempt to control the flow of Chelsea Tractors blocking the street. Council Leader Lord True personally hires a JCB and, with a cry of ‘victory!’, smashes through the barricades, slightly injuring a cute kitten and tearing the sleeve of his new jacket.
- Richmond Council runs a consultation exercise on how many public consultations the public want. Opposers of public consultations initiate a judicial review… which the Council then wins. An El Brute press release follows requesting no further discussion about public consultations.
- The Twickenham Advisory Panel breaks cover, writes a proposal for an alternative government in Twickenham, gains official UN recognition but then gets disbanded by the Council.
- The development plans for the old Royal Mail sorting office site get approved. Someone, somewhere is not happy. They hand paint a banner in order to get on the front page of the Richmond & Twickenham Times.
- Sainsburys opens on Twickenham Green. Initially people vow not to use it… but hang on, it’s just soooo convenient. A “Fortnum & Mason Local” opens in The Crown on Richmond Road.
- In the wake of the early success of Laverstoke Park Farm Butchers and Rubens Bakehouse, a candlestick maker sets up on York Street. Demand for candlesticks turns out to be weak and although sales of gift-wrapped scented candles hold up fairly well it closes within six months.
- Twickenham Green breaks the world record for the number of fetes and fun days in one location. 28 similar events take place on it over the summer. It corners the market and soon becomes the only place in London where you can buy weak tea, fruit cake and potted geraniums.
- Street improvements take place in King Street. The raised pavement road surface gives traffic-bound car drivers a much better view of the wide range of charity shops.
We can’t be sure all of the above will happen, some will, some won’t, but however things turn out, 2013 is certain to be an interesting year. Why not add your predictions below?
And if you want to discuss these ideas and more, then keep an eye out for the “twickerati Twickenham meet up” coming to a pub near you later this month.